Valentine Schmalentine...

When I was in grade school, an awkward nerdy girl at a stuffy Catholic school, Valentine's day was always torture for me. I would decorate my box and carefully fill out Valentine's for each of my classmates, praying just praying that I would receive one "genuine" Valentine in return.

One year I even wrote on a Valentine to a boy I liked asking him to go to a movie with me...

It was epic fail.

I mean, so epic fail that said Valentine was read aloud from the highest point in the playground while I was mercilessly laughed at and sent running, tears flying, to hide out under a climbing tower.

Needless to say that was a pick up attempt that was completely, 100% SHUT DOWN.

Rejection is so brutal for an 11 year old.

So anyway, all the kids are required to give each classmate a valentine... It's the rules.

I think those rules were made for kids like me, so that our box wouldn't be empty.

Thanks to the narcissism of Valentine's day and my burning desire to have my own true Valentine, the first 10 or so Valentine's of my primary educated life were just plain crummy.

When I got to about 7th grade, I started having boyfriends. I managed to always have one right around Valentine's day, I think because of my intense fear of loneliness and humiliation.

Ok so the next few Valentine's days of my life weren't so bad.... I had a couple awkward dances and a date or too. Then my senior year of high school I had a boyfriend (he last only about 2 weeks, but just so happened to exist around Valentine's day) that pretty much made up for every obligatory valentine I had ever been given... I will be honest, I don't really remember said "boyfriend" very well. But I remember 8th period on Valentine's day...

I had been called to the office to receive flowers and what not twice already that day. One was from my Mom and Dad, the other from my Nana and Ahda... So I was feeling kind of loserish by the time 8th period came around... I mean, come on, I finally had a legitimate boyfriend on Valentine's day and hadn't reaped the benefits of being publicly showered with lavish gifts.

And then the "runners" from the office came down to call me for a pick up. They had 3 slips.

3.

That is a lot.

So much in fact that the runner warned me to bring a friend or two to carry it all back.

So my friend Amber and I ran down to the office and asked where my delivery was. They pointed to an annex that had lots of deliveries left in it - flowers, a huge balloon bouquet, two GIANT boxes, and a big heart shaped pillow with a big fat box of chocolates on it...

When I asked which one was mine... the office clerk looked at me with this exasperate expression and said "All of it..."

HA!

SCORE!

So we lugged the loot back to 8th period, I passed around chocolates, and my very nosy and easily distracted teacher canceled the rest of class to watch me open my presents.

After tracking down a knife (not that hard to do in a public school, surprisingly) to open the boxes, we ripped those suckers open to reveal two GIANT sized teddy bears. Boyd's Bears, to be exact. And if you know your teddies, Boyd's is top of the line. One was a 4 foot tall teddy, the other about 2 feet or so...

It was ridiculous.

Oh and did I mentioned a bouquet of 2 dozen wired roses in a gorgeous vase...

Yeah, it pretty much made up for everything.

And like 1 week or so later that guy was gone and out of my life... And I can hardly remember his name... but he definitely rehabilitated Valentine's Day for me.

My first Valentine's Day with my husband was 2008. Our son was 2 months old and we were traveling across country in a huge moving truck with a trailer on the end of it, a cat, a dog, and a nursing newborn.

It had every ingredient necessary to cook up a big, giant disaster. (Did I mention the blizzard? Yeah, that too.)

But my amazingly romantic husband cleverly planned a stop at our home state, we stayed with his parents, and on Valentine's day he took me out for sushi at my favorite restaurant, and presented me with a gorgeous diamond necklace.

Take that Senior Year Boyfriend! You got schooled!

So this Valentine's Day my husband is gone and my Valentine is my precious son. Which I guess is in a way, a Valentine from my husband.

I don't even need flowers, chocolates, or giant stuffed teddy bears to have an amazing Valentine's day anymore.

That may sound corny, but honestly, all of that was just for show... To feel special in front of a group of people.

Which is why I can tell I have grown up.

My love for my husband isn't about spectacles or putting on a show in the middle of an 8th period classroom, or reading an embarrassing Valentine in front of everyone at school. It's just love.



Pure, unconditional, make me weak in the knees at the thought of him, LOVE.

We have those romantic moments that make other people want to throw up



We make each other laugh,





usually he makes me laugh harder...



He always knows what to say or do to cheer me up when I am down... Or to make me laugh when I am obsessing over bills, laundry, etc.



We have our serious moments where only we can be there for each other.



He looks at me in a way no one else ever has, or ever will.



He completes me... He is the yin to my yang, the peanut butter to my jelly, the freshly ground pepper to my coarse natural sea salt.

He is the best friend I ever had, no embarrassing "will you go out with me" valentine necessary.

So happy Valentine's Day to the love of my life. I miss you, I love you, and I am so thankful for you... no matter how February 14th is spent.